The in-between

I sit in my hotel room waiting for the nurse to update me on my blood-work results. From the morning ultrasound it seems we might well trigger sometime tonight, tomorrow at the very latest. I am physically exhausted but emotionally doing pretty okay, considering the relentless roller-coaster this cycle has been.

We attended a CCS class today and I was surprised to realize that even if I am lucky enough to make a normal embryo and prep for an FET, it takes anywhere between 6-8 weeks from egg retrieval to finally reach that stage! Considering that we are, in all likelihood, going in for egg banking, that means the earliest I could be pregnant would be well into March of next year. Such. a. long. time. away. Any other time in my life, this would have made impatient me stomp my feet, flare my nostrils and make irrational demands of life/nature to hurry the hell up, reality be damned! But I am older now (as my eggs keep, not so gently, reminding me!), wiser (even if reluctantly so!) and definitely way more patient and accepting of reality so I don’t flail around haplessly, panicking at the thought of the many miles to go. Well, at least not yet.

There’s a lot to be done, a lot to be explored and you just cannot survive the IVF race if you look too far into the future. Actually, that reminds me, I should write a post on what I think should be known as every girl’s essential IVF survival kit. By no means am I an expert and obviously I haven’t yet had my own success story, but just between my first and second rounds I have learned so much I feel I should reach out to those just beginning this journey as I know only too well how overwhelming it can look from the outside.

In the meantime, I take a calming sip of my peppermint tea, snuggle into my blankets and get ready to wait some more!


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